Self Sufficient

Hello Friends,

I am happy to report my garden is doing well.  I can see changes in the rate of growth. The tomatoes are done, the peppers are there but small, and the sunflowers are almost ready to harvest.  With the cooler weather the plants naturally wain. I have just begun my self sufficient trek so I will allow it all to go for the winter.  Most homesteaders plant a fall and winter garden with row covers and cold frames. I did a cold frame one winter that was mild using old windows from the house. (I love to re purpose things.) However, this year will be different. More thought is going to my my planning, soil, and plants. My research is ongoing so I will take some time and replant next spring.  I freeze most of my foods that I have grown. Its easy for me and I need the freezer full so it runs less thereby saving energy. I have a smaller refrigerator now. Before I had two large refrigerators with freezer attached. Now I'm down to a side by side fridge in the kitchen and full size freezer in the basement. I have a food dehydrator and have used is for tomatoes. They taste like sun-dried tomatoes. I will use it again for beef jerky and dried apples for snacking. Canning is a problem at the moment because my electric stove has a glass cook top and the weight of the canner with all the water will be too much for it to hold. So canning will wait till I have a single burner to rest it on.

I have been enjoying my time here at the house, researching sewing, growing/preserving food and caring for the property. I have a lot to be proud of.  My research in homesteading is paying off by being more prepared to handle whatever the future brings with little waste of money and resources. Getting away from big agriculture, learning the process of raising crops and preserve what I have grown is the best way for me to care for myself and my family.  Its sad to see how animals are treated in food processing plants. and the way vegetables are altered giving us little nutrients for what we consume and the high cost of all of them. I wanted to create a more satisfying way of living and am getting there day by day. So I invest my time and efforts in to being self sufficient. Also, we all are used to a disposable lifestyle, I am too. But for me... I had the desire to learn to use less disposable materials keeping most things in glass containers, using cloth napkins and dish towels instead of paper. I reuse plastic storage bags as many times as I can by washing them out. The exception to this is the bags that held meats. They are tossed after each use.  It's these little things that help the environment and our wallets. It takes some getting used to but is easy once you have the mind set of conservation. We recycle almost all of our plastics, paper and metals. What cannot be picked up by the town will be taken to either the metal recycling plant once a year or repurposed if possible. My good friend Ingrid Justic has helped me see how convenient all these things listed in my blog are to do. It just takes awareness and the willingness to try. She has truly helped me to learn how to go natural with everything. I knew of all this before I met Ingrid, but I never used the knowledge in my everyday living. I thank her here and I will thank her in person the next time I see her.

To continue my path to self sufficiency I will be buying solar panels and learning to use them as soon as finances allow. They are much cheaper now and easier to use than ever before.  I long for a wood stove but fitting it in my house is a problem. Its just too tiny to fit one. The money you save heating with wood is so great your wallet will be closed almost permanently. Wood is hard to cut without a log splitter, but for around $1800 you can get a good gas powered one and split 10 cords over a summer with little effort. Wood is $200 per cord pre-cut, but if you team up with a tree trimming company your can get it for free. Make sure you have a place to cut and store the wood and you are set. Our house is secure for winter heating though. We have saved up and added a large electric hot water heater (Thanks to our good friend Orlando and My husband Tom)  to off set the oil bill which can be upwards of $800 per fill 3-4 times per year. Also on hand is the kerosene heater for power outages, and to supplement heat where ever we need it.  I will never give up my hair dryer or my dishwasher or my washer and dryer for the laundry. So if your are thinking I will live like an Amish person your are completely out of your mind.  However, going "off the grid" never really meant that lifestyle anyway.  Self sufficient means you can live without those things and can care for your self without needing everything prepackaged, and delivered to your door. Breaking free from the high bills of the energy companies, using solar power, keeping more of what you earn, and for the love, the joy and pride of doing it yourself.  That is where its at for most homesteaders.  I am getting there. I enjoy the work.  Do what you can to save the earth for your children.  We all have a responsibility to our future.

Blessing to you all.

Suz

I don't want to get up in the morning

I feel so lucky or blessed to live this life of mine that I can't really complain about things. I hear my self complain and I stop and say "Well remember how it used to be?"
Then I hear my kids say "Ugh I do not want to get up." I do realize it's just an expression, but still I want to tell them "This is the good life."

I don't want to work anymore either. Truth. I want to stay home and be a house keeper. Never thought I would say that. Ugh! I love my work as a Massage Therapist. I more so love my work as a Mentor. But it's easy to just stay home. My point is, once we get going in our day, we have focus, a schedule and more of the ability to get things done. If you had no outside schedule to focus you, would you be productive? Enjoy what life you have here and now. We have such little time on this planet. Even when I am at the school helping the kids in the lunch room. I see my part in their young lives. If I smile they smile too. If I am grouchy, they look away, to avoid the feeling. So I try to smile and say hello to every child. When I am at Sense-Abilities practicing Massage, I smile as much as possible. I is a place of unwinding, of relaxation and peace. I have learned that life can be a lot worse. Each day I wake up, is a new chance to make a better life. Especially if I have someone who is making an effort to smile at me. Even though they, most likely, did not want to get up. By not taking the Easy way out, I have a rich full life. By not taking the Easy way out, I have people I talk with and friends at work to chat with. I have clients who also are a pleasure to converse with. They leave the spa feeling good and that makes me feel good. Life is hard sometimes. But mostly it's a good life.

Be grateful for every bill, every morning, and every penny. It is a new opportunity each time you see them.

Suz

What the hell am I doing?

I have just finished watching TV and having coffee on this Sunday morning and realized something.

I was thinking about some young people I know and was considering asking them "Where is your life going?" Then the little voice in my head said Where is your life going Suzanne? (no I so not have a mental disease) I am a Massage Therapist, Reiki Master, a Mother, and have a 44 year life experience in people. I come from a "normal" family with the typical problems. Addiction being one. Divorce another. Abuse both physical and verbal another. My own divorce was a product of my own awakening. So where is my life going?

My dream is to be a Life Coach. I am studying now and wish to go somewhere with it but after looking myself up on the web, I have found that I do not appear anywhere. I have Facebook, Google Blog Spot, Linked IN, and had various web sites for my Massage practice. But unless I really try, I can't be found.

So... Here is where I will change my life once again. I have not been blogging. I have not been telling people about my work. I have been contemplating what I want but have not really done any of the work. Here is my opinion.

Where is my life going? While having the ability to spit out some positive one liners on Facebook these words of wisdom go nowhere. I understand the value of my one line positive injections in to the world but do others really get anything from them? Here is the deal people. You are what you think you are. I think the only real purpose of me having suffered in life was to teach others what not to do. My mistakes are not new. Nor are they different or revealing. But perhaps I can help Someone with my growth.

I will be offering my helping words of wisdom on as many Internet mediums as I can so I can spread the word that people are not alone or unique. Our problems are universal and we can share how we deal with those problems. I have failed at numerous things. Jobs for instance. I have rang registers, swept floors, made pizza, answered phones, and tried unsuccessfully to please a myriad of people in the inter um. All with failure. Thank God I failed at them. I learned that I really did not want to do any of them and was unhappy all the while. However, if I hadn't been fired as many times as I have I would have blindly chugged along on the wrong path. Even in my Massage Career I have been pleasing people. I am a people pleaser by nature, but that is not where I am going with this. I in fact have always wanted to help other Women (because I am a woman) with their struggle in life to make a place for themselves in this world. We gals are the Mother's the Teacher's the nurturers, the feeders, the givers and the lovers of this world. Yet we question everything. Am I right and I wrong? Am I good enough? and so on. This is what drives me to write. I am not a good writer but regardless I will write anyway. Why? Because it is the only way to broadcast my opinions. Not everyone will agree with my opinions, but that's OK. I can help a few with them anyway.

So this is what I am doing. Telling you that you need not be a people pleaser. Only please yourself, please. You are beautiful enough. You are smart enough. You are strong enough. You are good enough. All of you. Stop trying. Start doing. No more reasoning and contemplating. Enough! Get up and start your life. I will be your cheerleader. I am here to cheer for you the under dog whoever and whomever you are. My seemingly rosy, useless one liners are here to propel you forward. Now they will be individual guides to changing your life for the better. Now I will be writing on as many blogs as I can find and link all of them to something and have my source for conducting change in my world. Yes kids, Mom will not shut up! HELLO! I'M HERE! They hate that. My kids. They are a true reflection of me. Both of them. Ah my reminder of how I came to be the woman I am. My children. Thank God for them!

Show me other ways of broadcasting my words of wisdom! Tell me where I can go to write. And if you feel so inclined, tell me what you think. I can take it.

Worry

I worry about may things. My future and my children mostly. I try to stop worrying but it often creeps back in to my thinking. When I stop the thoughts, I start new one's so my mind won't wander. Like I think about my cute dog or starting a project. If I am at work, I work harder and focus more I my client. This drowns out my worry. It's really a fear you know, worry. You fear the worst of a situation. Or the things that are unknown. But where does it get you? Nowhere better than where you are right now. Yet we still do it. I know my worrying over my kids will never help them do better in life, but I feel compelled to think about it over and over sometimes. Many times I trick my mind by thinking the problem is resolved and that we are living the best life possible. That works very well for quite some time. I think from the end of the situation back. Act as if it were resolved or never happened. Take for instance my daughters grades in High School. I worry that she won't do well. So I think about her graduating at the top of her class and being very successful right now. It feels good and I stop the worrying. I think if I contemplate the good thoughts, I will create the good. I know when I have contemplated the bad thought, they happened. It was almost freaky.

Today I am worried for my Son. He has a driving violation that we have to go to court for and I fear he will have points on his license and have to pay big bucks to the insurance company. Money we do not have. I believe he is a good driver and we come out of this a winner. So I guess I will only think of that, winning. But the worries still creep in every now and then.

Bless this day
Suzanne

Fulfilment

Today I asked myself the next question of why I don't feel fulfilled. How do I fill my life? I have two kids that are growing up. One is going off to college and one is a teen (omg). I have a lovely home and a dog who I love. What's Next?

Then this came to my mind:
Dreaming! Daydreaming about traveling, beaches, arts, exotic cities, and shopping. As I dream I fill my mind with what pleases me. It takes me away from home or work and puts me where I want to be. If you want something out of life, you have to try to find ways to achieve your goal. Even if that means only dreaming about it. I think its healthy to daydream about what you want. I think if I focus on what I want I will get it some day. I know God has a plan for me and that I have to be patient. After all I can't just forget about my family and do whatever I want. That would just be irresponsible. Not at all like me. So I will have to save money for my travels. Not easy.

Now I am pissed. This sucks. I once again some how put it on the back burner. "Well I guess I will have to save money. Not Easy." Saying that make my wishes some how unobtainable. So now I feel depressed. I think my goals need to be apart of my everyday life. Not just a trip that I have to save for. I will get there. I will make a life that is fulfilling. I know I can.

More to come!